Trust has been a big theme in my life recently. And that’s why I thought it was worth talking about today.
I see so many well-intentioned little pictures and shares and posts that say things along the lines of, “Trust that whatever you need, you will be given.” And while I totally agree with that message, I think there are some misunderstandings around it that I’d love to try to clear up.
You see, to me, trust can be experienced as passive or active. I’ve come to learn that we need a balance of both.
If we experience trust as only passive, we will “trust” that God or the Universe or reality itself will provide for us, but we won’t take the necessary action on our part to help create the experiences which can really let us live the lives we really want to live.
If we trust without any action, we will stay stuck in relationships that no longer serve us. This includes not only romantic relationships but potentially those with parents, family members, or friends who are close to us, but from whom we may have grown in a very different direction. We will be fearful inside, too fearful to leave, but somehow “trusting” that something better will happen to us. But if we really want better relationships, we need to find within ourselves the courage to leave any that no longer serve us.
If we trust without any action, we will stay stuck in that job that we hate, “trusting” that something better will come along, but not taking any action on our part to find or to create something better for ourselves.
If we trust without any action, we will stay stuck in different ways of thinking and feeling, and therefore different ways of acting, without realizing that it may be time for us to open, to expand, and to grow into new ways. We won’t even consider creative possibilities or different steps we may be able to take in order to progress with or to even completely solve a long-term problem, because we will “trust” that somehow it will magically get solved.
Do we really not believe that we are deserving of better than these things?
Isn’t there a space, deep down inside of our very beings, that knows the truth about who we really are?
Isn’t there a space deep within that knows that we are meant to expand, to grow, to learn, and to act on inspiration even if it is risky or scary or feels vulnerable to do so? Isn’t that what life is all about?
And yet, we also need balance with action taking as well. I see so many people who are constantly taking action, constantly in motion, constantly doing and going and “trying” so hard to even just get by in life. I see so many people who don’t seem to realize that constant action is on the other opposite end of the balance between action and trust. To me, so much action is a huge symptom of a deep sense of anxiety in the outward world, and I believe that in this case, more inner connection is really needed. But for so many people, fear keeps us from really connecting to those parts of ourselves that will allow us to heal, to transform, and to grow.
So why are we so scared of connecting with our inner selves? Well, for starters, there are so many things in our society which distract us from doing so, and in general, our society emphasizes that outward connections and goals are the most important ways to get ahead and to succeed. We are told that we need to know the right people, to get the right stuff, to have the right kind of job in order to be successful. But I think that society has it completely backwards.
We have to believe that we are fully equipped with all the courage we need in order to look inside our hearts and ask ourselves, “What is really hurting here, and why? Why do I feel compelled to get drawn into distractions and keep going and being ‘busy’ yet feeling that I’m getting nowhere fast? What do I really want my life to look like, and why might I be afraid of actually living it that way? What past hurts do I still carry that need to be let go of? What am I really afraid of if I go against what society tells me to do? Do I really think I will be completely and utterly alone?”
The answer, at least to that last question, is absolutely not. :) But it is definitely easy to feel that way, especially when we are going through difficult times. And it is definitely very easy to avoid asking ourselves these questions and knowing that we have the courage to grow, to create, and to make our lives just what we’ve always wanted them to be.
So yes, a great balance is needed between action and trust. Sometimes when we are taking inspired action to co-create our lives, even then it is necessary to trust that our actions will help us, all in the best time. Likewise, simply trusting without action will not allow us the peace and happiness we are deserving of in this lifetime, and taking constant action without looking inside and trusting our own hearts will not allow us that peace and happiness either.
How do we find this balance? We have a new opportunity with every choice, every minute, every day of our lives. If we’ve made a choice that doesn't feel so great to us anymore, or if when we really tune in, we sense that it's a choice that is keeping us from telling ourselves our truths and working through our fears, we can actively change our minds and hearts and make a different one. And if we’ve made a choice that feels good to us and healthy for us in every sense of the word, we can let up on the gas pedal a little and trust that life is working with us to give us something even more extraordinary than we may have ever imagined possible.
I’ve found that it all comes down to those very important reminders that I say to you each week in these reflections: Remember—you are deserving, you are worthy, and you are good enough. Start or continue creating your ideal life today—it is never too late, as long as you are here. And trust that with action inspired from the depths of your being, it will come to fruition in the best timing.
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No matter what, always remember this: You are deserving, you are worthy, and you are good enough. Keep being you, keep shining, and keep growing!
With great love,